IN ONE WEEK I WILL BE 31

YES ITS TRUE.... THE BIG 3-1, OH MY! YOU SEE THE PROBLEM WITH THIS IS, I SET LIFE GOALS AND I ALWAYS SET THEM TO END ON MY BIRTHDAY AND GUESS WHAT?... THEY NEVER COME TRUE. I MEAN SURE, THE SMALL ONES THAT ONLY TAKE FIVE MIN TO ACCOMPLISH DO. BUT IM TALKING BIG TIME BABE RUTH GRAND SLAM GOALS! ARE YOU WITH ME? I HOPE SO CAUSE IM LOST IN THE CONFUSION.

THE PROBLEM WITH THIS IS.... LIFE HAPPENS. ITS ALL AROUND ME AND UNEXPECTED. I GUESS I SHOULD CHANGE THEM FROM "GOALS" TO "DESIRES". MAYBE THEN THE REALISM WILL SET IN.

SO THE QUESTION ALL OF YOU ARE ASKING... WHAT WAS MY BIG GOAL FOR THIS YEAR????? FIRST ONE TO GUESS GETS A PARTY FAVOR

IT CAN MAKE YOU FACE ALL YOU'RE FEARS

WHAT IF THIS WHOLE TIME WE KNEW EXACTLY WHAT WE WANTED AND NEVER ACTED UPON IT?

FEAR.... ARE YOU TIRED OF ME TALKING ABOUT IT? I AM...... I AM VERY TIRED OF IT AND YET WE STILL KEEP ON KEEPING ON.

I THINK IT IS FUNNY HOW LIFE WORKS. THE WAY "FRIENDS" COME IN AND OUT OF OUR LIVES. ITS ALMOST AS PREDICTABLE AS A SUNSET.

I DREAM OF A WORLD WITH OUT FEAR. I DREAM OF A TIME WHEN WE CAN SAY HOW WE REALLY FEEL OR BETTER YET ACT UPON IT. IM FINDING IT HARD TO BREATHE SOMETIMES WITH ALL OF THESE SMOKE SCREENS AROUND ME.

I WAS ASKED YESTERDAY...."WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?" TO WHICH I REPLIED...."IM LOOKING FOR SOMEONE WHO IS NOT AFRAID OF LOVE."

I QUESTIONING HONESTY ALL THE TIME. ARE WE WORRIED ABOUT OUR POLITICAL AGENDA THAT WE ARE LYING TO OURSELVES SO OFTEN THAT WE ARE NOT EVEN SURE WHAT THE WORD HONESTY MEANS? I MEAN FOR FIVE SECONDS LETS BE REAL. WHEN IS THE LAST TIME WE SPOKE WITHOUT THINKING OF WHAT THE CONSEQUENCES ARE? WHEN IS THE LAST TIME WE SAT DOWN IF FRONT OF THE MIRROR AND REALLY LAID IT ALL OUT ON THE LINE? I THINK WE LIVE IN THIS "BACK POCKET" STATE OF MIND SO WE WILL ALWAYS HAVE OPTIONS EVEN WHEN WE KNOW WHAT THE REAL HONEST SOLUTIONS ARE. IM CHANGING RAPIDLY AND IM NOT SURE WHO WILL BE ABLE TO KEEP UP